The whole point of being a web developer is that you create websites for people. I'm now at the stage in my craft when I can actually do that - so I am and it's all starting to get very scary.
The issue with creating things is that there is no point when you've tried everything. One minute you're wandering about and the next you've had an idea for something. Technology has a similar issue. You start off knowing nothing and you never ever ever get to the point where you know everything. As soon as you've learnt everything you think possible to know about something, some smart arse goes and invents something else.
If you decide that you're going to spend your life creating things with technology, then you will probably have a lot of days where you feel like a plank who doesn't know anything! Negative self talk aside I have realised that I will never get to the end. As soon as I master a piece of software or a programming language there'll be a better way to do it. In fact before I even start there is somebody sat at home inventing a better way. I don't know what Ruby on Rails is yet but I'll bet you a fiver that somebody is already working on an upgrade.
The first time I looked at a piece of source code and understood what I was looking at, I felt like a genius. In fact the warm, smug feeling lasted for days. Unfortunately more and more frequently I keep finding things I haven't learnt how to do yet. I recently started learning web scripting - so all the smugness I've built up by mastering HTML has been replaced with insecurity about my abilities with PHP. The problem is that I'm impatient. I want to know how to do everything now. Right now, right this minute!
The plan behind the web development came from my position as a frustrated retailer. I had an e-commerce site that didn't perform and couldn't afford to pay somebody else to do it for me. Therefore I decided to go to university and learn how to write my own websites. A little OTT perhaps but being at uni keeps me out of mischief during the day and lets me look after my family during the school holidays, which is more than can be said for my previous life as a shop keeper or the one before as a senior manager.
My love of retail comes and goes, so whilst I'm perfecting my craft, I'm producing sites for other people. At the moment I'm building sites for people I know and who more importantly, know me. Despite the fact that I'm working with my friends, these are real sites for real people so I have to get it right. My work will be used to represent their businesses. Out there in real life. It is not like the website university are making me create for a ficticious conference centre - these are real people with real businesses in the real world and that is scary. In fact some days it's absolutely bloody terrifying but the best way to conquerer your fears is to just get up and do it. The more sites I create - the better I get at it and the friends I'm building sites for at the moment will be getting updated sites next year when I know even more.
So between the coursework, the client sites, the family and the procrastination it looks as though I'm going to be really busy for the forseeable future.
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